Lessons from the queen’s final journey

THE queen did not have wings. And she did not ride on a merry-go-round. I am not meaning the kind of wings that birds, butterflies and even angels have, nor am I referring to the wings you can get from a high-energy drink.

And the merry-go-round? I am not thinking of the carousel you find in amusement parks and playlots that have kids screaming with glee. I am commenting on the simplicity of the Queen Elizabeth II’s hearse. And some other aspects of her funeral.

When I caught glimpses of all the “tamasha” from the time she passed away on September 8 in Balmoral Castle in Scotland, until she was finally laid to rest on September 19 in Windsor Castle in England, I was struck by certain simple elements.

Take for example the hearse in which Her Majesty travelled from RAF Northolt to Buckingham Palace and which was also used for the funeral. It had no gull-wing doors or a rotating panel for the coffin to execute a showy horizontal cartwheel. Instead, pallbearers sombrely loaded and offloaded the coffin, silently sliding on rollers, through the standard rear door of the royal hearse.

The hearse, a Jaguar Land Rover, apparently had input from the queen when it was designed a few years ago. It was used for the first time for her funeral and featured wide windows along the side and back to give a clear view of the coffin.

I can already see local undertakers signing orders for their new hearses to copy the royal hearse’s see-through glass roof and bright spotlights inside, along the roof edge, to illuminate the coffin. Never mind that unlike the queen’s funeral schedule, which included some journeys when it was dark, local funeral processions are in broad daylight.

Some years ago, almost all funeral vehicles were painted black to symbolise the colour of mourning in Western culture. Then some second-hand hearses which were white in colour were imported from the United States. Now most hearses that are manufactured locally are painted white to symbolise a new life.

However, with the queen’s final ride being in a hearse that was painted Royal Claret, don’t be surprised to see the darkest shade of wine red soon becoming the de rigueur colour for local funeral fleets.

In terms of the make and model of local hearses, we are already high up there – or even better than the queen. While the royal hearse is based on a dated XJ saloon, our funeral directors have invested in the latest marques of stretched Range Rovers, Porsches and Rolls-Royces to transport the dead.

One thing I am baffled by, but have been too embarrassed to ask in case the answer is obvious, is why a new Porsche leads the luxury hearse owned by some funeral homes. Is this to outshine police motorbike outriders? I also guess it must be painfully testing for the driver of the Porsche to keep a light foot on the accelerator of a car designed for the racing circuit. And equally taxing it must be to avoid the minefield of potholes that have come to resemble our roads.

The queen’s hearse was followed by a convoy of funeral vehicles carrying other members of the royal family. Nowadays it is common to find that local undertakers also have a small fleet of vehicles following the hearse. The only difference is that many of these vehicles travel without passengers.

One funeral director told me that the inclusion of an armada of luxury vehicles can push the price of the funeral to between R60 000 and R100 000. And he added that while families that were wellheeled often chose standard, no-frills funerals, it was the poorer folk who hankered after over-the-top funerals, complete with bagpiper – playing the Om Namashivaya mantra in monotonous dirge-style – and 21 white doves to signify family and friends’ release of their loved one’s physical presence on Earth.

But then I guess for some people their ride to the cemetery or crematorium marks their first – and only – ride in a top-of-the-line luxury vehicle.

Bereaved families too can take a leaf (pun unintended) from the floral arrangement that sat atop the queen’s coffin. It did not look ostentatious or flamboyant. In fact, I thought it looked a bit dull and unarranged. But it would not have cost much – or even anything – unlike the R550 being charged by some local flower sellers for a box of marigolds to drape around the coffin. Wouldn’t a garland of mango leaves suffice – and save money?

I have learnt that flowers and foliage from royal residences - Buckingham Palace, Clarence House and Highgrove House – were used for the spray on the queen’s coffin, including rosemary for remembrance, English oak for love and myrtle for a happy marriage. More interesting is that this myrtle was cut from a plant grown from a sprig of myrtle that was in the queen’s wedding bouquet when she married Prince Philip in 1947, a whole 75 years ago. And by the queen’s request, the wreath had to be sustainable, with no foam used.

Another thing for which we need to give credit to the team that oversaw the queen’s funeral arrangements, is timekeeping.

Three weeks ago, I attended the funeral of an old family acquaintance. The body was to be available for viewing at the crematorium from 3pm until 3.30pm. There were only about 25 mourners present. At 3.15pm, the undertaker’s representative closed the coffin and despatched it to the furnace. As I drove out of the crematorium grounds at 3.20pm, I saw three families entering in the mistaken belief that they had 10 minutes more to view the deceased.

I have witnessed several similar incidents at Clare Estate Crematorium when the body was sent into the furnace well ahead of the announced time. The crematorium manager who was responsible for this dastardly deed is providentially no more.

The queen’s various funeral services took place in clockwork fashion. It struck me on September 14 that the queen’s coffin was scheduled to be carried by a gun carriage in a procession from Buckingham Palace to the Palace of Westminster, travelling down the mall with members of the royal family walking behind, commencing at 2.22pm. Why such an exact time, I pondered?

The most likely reason is the journey time between Buckingham Palace and Westminster Hall. The duration of the journey from the palace to its destination is exactly 38 minutes on foot at a certain pace. The time of 2.22pm could, therefore, have been chosen to ensure the queen’s body arrived at 3pm.

The same happened on September 19. At exactly 10.44am – not 10.40am or 10.45am – the queen’s coffin was taken in a procession from the Palace of Westminster to Westminster Abbey to be exactly on time for the State Funeral to commence at 11am.

If there’s a single salient lesson to be learnt from the queen’s funeral, it is planning. Advanced planning had been done for this momentous occasion.

Planning ahead allows for planning with a clear mind rather than taking rash – and expensive – decisions during a highly emotional time.

If you must one day shoulder the responsibility of arranging the funeral of a beloved relative, do some of the planning now.

When the time comes, you don’t have too much planning to do. There will be freedom for celebrating the departed soul and for grief. Freedom for all of the feelings.