Tried to open case against father

A RAPE survivor has found her voice and is using her platform to uplift and counsel women and children in her community who were sexually violated.

The 44-year-old, of uMlazi, said her father had raped her for eight years – starting when she was 8 years old.

“I grew up as an aggressive child. For my father to stop molesting me, I had to fight for myself because there was no one to protect me as a young girl.

“At the age of 16, I took self-defence classes.

“I lived a separate life as a teenager that my family was not aware of.”

She said she first reported the rape to her high school principal.

“But because my dad was a wellknown and trusted priest in the community, the principal did not believe me.

“I then reported the matter to social workers and managed to get some counselling to deal with trauma and anger.

“The social workers advised me to open a case against my father. When I was 18, I tried to open a case at the police station but I was told it was just a common case because the rape had ended two years earlier. When I reflect, I don’t know what they meant by common case. I was also told there was insufficient proof to arrest the perpetrator.

“That is why I later started a nonprofit organisation to help children and adults get help and find their voices to speak out against abuse. My organisation also focuses on helping those who are HIV positive.

“While growing up, I have realised that there are a lot of children who remain in abusive and toxic households.

“They end up being taken advantage of and also being molested by their relatives.

“I have come across cases where children need homes because they live in a toxic household and they are not safe.

“It hurts that there is not enough help for them and the police and the justice system in South Africa does not seem to protect children as it should.”

She continued: “So many years have passed but I still have nightmares about my ordeal. I will never heal from what my father did.

“Even worse, he died in 2017 without being held accountable or prosecuted for what he did to me and other females in my family.

“I now pour out my pain through writing and motivating others.”

She said what was hurtful about being raped, was that no amount of counselling could help her.